"...The interviewer asked, “Are you one of those who believe that Jesus is exclusively the only way to heaven?” He added, “You know how mad that makes people these days!” Without blinking she replied, “Jesus is not exclusive. He died so that anyone could come to Him for salvation.”" Our Daily Bread

Even me, Lord. Sometimes I get to thinking about the daily struggles I continue to have and I just feel so defeated. I feel it necessary to wallow before You in utter shame. No, I didn't murder. But you say that my heart's attitude is all that's needed to sin. I am still so polluted with it! I wish there were a quick fix - a silver bullet to the flesh - that stopped sin from ever coming back to life in me. But there is no such thing. The promise that sin's curse has lost it's hold over me (if I choose to operate under that reality), but I cannot be stop sinning until Heaven.

However, You do so much work in me, Lord! You desire to make me beautiful, holy, spotless, blameless. You desire for me to partake in your holiness. And YOU WILL do it! How can I help?!? :) Just kidding! But I know that my part is to just keep doing what I know to do. Be in your Word daily absorbing and retaining the truth there, seek You in prayer all throughout the day, and worship and fellowship with other Christians. I cannot even do any of THOSE simple activities by myself, though. So I'll be expecting You to be right there with me when I make the decisions to do them. Forgive me for the horrible darkness in my heart that I allow to fester and produce sin. Not that I can control it, but I consistently don't ask You to deal with what's inside before it manifests into bad attitudes and bad actions.

Honestly, Lord, I've been willing to let things fester and I'm not sure why. Is it because I want to indulge myself because I "deserve" it? Is it because I haven't been in Your Word as regularly as I need to nourish my love for You that would make sinning more detestable? Is it because You're allowing me to go through a time of temptation and trial so that I learn the taste in my mouth next time I stumble? Is it because I still have very incorrect views of myself and/or You? Could it be all or most or a couple of those things?

Regardless, I praise You. I praise You because despite my feelings and troubles, You are WORTHY to be praised. You are the ONLY thing worthy to be praised! Sure, I praise my son, my husband, my friends, my family. But the only qualities/actions in them worthy to be praised are the ways they reflect You, or are made in Your image. Everything else in us and about us is dung. Thank You that You are the opposite of dung, Lord! lol Make the dung that is me be more and more anti-dung every day so that You may receive glory upon glorious glory!