“For who has known the mind of the Lord,
or who has been his counselor?”
“Or who has given a gift to him
that he might be repaid?”
For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.
I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. " Romans 11:33-12:5Lord, I am FROM You, and THROUGH You, and To You. Everything I am is ultimately for Your glory. Therefore, I am not my own, so I present my body as a living sacrifice. BUT. Here's where I get caught up: yesterday I said that all I have is filthy rags. I have nothing of value to give. But here it says I am to "present my body as a living sacrifice, HOLY and ACCEPTABLE to God". So here again, I can't just lay back on the altar idly and say "take me now, Jesus!" If I do that, I'm liable to wiggle off again as soon as I have something more fun to do. But this act of sacrifice is a DISCIPLINE (not able to be undertaken apart from You, but not able to be done without my choosing it). It is my WORSHIP, You say. And the way I can tell which disciplines to do and which not to is to stop listening to the world's wisdom and continually be renewed mentally (by Your Word, by prayer, etc). A practice not stubbornly pounded out with sheer brute force, but diligently practiced over and over with sensitivity to Your leading.
Lately, I've been feeling like I need to carry around my bible on my forehead and soak it in every 5 minutes or so. My vices have been food, anger, and sleep. I can tell I'm passive aggressively rebelling, but I'm not sure why. I do know that I'm indulging my fleshly desires instead of following You closely. Ack. This is getting harder and harder, Lord! You won't let me slide by with this stuff anymore! I know it's because You love me and I have bugged You about my maturity and growth for a long time. Now that it's obvious the huge strides towards that we've made together, I'm all of a sudden getting cold feet? How can I see so much progress and not trust You for the next mile?!? Or even the next few inches?!? ACK! It's unreal how wretched I am!
Set next to You, I am the poop on the bottom of a shoe. But yet You love me! And You're so patient with me! And I house Your Spirit! And have access to Your mind! And have blessings abundantly! And can talk to You whenever I want! And have been given gifts to use for Your glory and my delight! And so much more than I could need or ask for!
I'm so sorry that I live so unworthy so much of the time. That I don't present myself as often as I should, and that I present something much less than holy and acceptable. Lord, please go with me today. Protect me from onslaught while I try to correct my laziness, gluttony, and rebelliousness. Empower me by Your Spirit to obey! I do love You Lord, even though so many times I don't show it. Thank You for loving me through all that.
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