I decided to quit the specific devotionals for a bit until I get in the habit of reading the Bible every day. I was reading my book and came across this conviction:

"How about you? How much time do you spend reading and studying God's Word? Notice, I didn't ask how often you attend church or Bible study. Neither did I ask you how much time you spend praying. How much do you read your Bible?...

The Bible is the mind of God in print. It gives men and women a purpose for living. It explains the mysteries of creation, suffering, heaven and hell. The Bible holds the keys for attaining and maintaining real success. It contains the blueprint for successful marriage and family relationships. The Scriptures contain the story of salvation, a story that reaches back to the beginning of time and extends into eternity. Is there really a good excuse for a Christin not to read the Bible?...

If you can read this book, you have no excuse for not reading your Bible. If you can read this book and you are not reading your Bible, you will never experience the Spirit-filled life with any consistency. Your Christian experience will for the most part be a subjective search for truth within the limited realm of your thoughts. Your conscience will never be a totally reliable guide since you are not renewing it to the truth of the Holy Spirit. And the peace of God will elude you. The Bible is the Holy Spirit's most objective way of communicating with His people. It is the only way to know anything about Him. There is NO substitute." pgs 305, 307

Wow. When You put it THAT way, Lord, what excuse DO I have? After just telling You how passionate I am about Your Word, You hit me in the head with that! Praise Your wonderful Name that You are able and willing to humble me. Yes, I love Your Word - I love learning about You and hearing what You have to tell me. But for the most part, I get it secondhand - through giants of the faith like my Pastor and Beth Moore. You are PERSONAL Lord and Savior. Yes, if the only avenue You have to speak to me (through my own choosing of some and neglect of others) is through another person, then You will. But what else am I missing out on by not spending time in the Bible with You alone? Forgive me Lord for being so blind to it. Thank You for leading me where You want me to go. Help me commit to reading with You every day. Not just weekdays, but also weekends. I need Your objective guidance and Your steady companionship to make it through this season - every season, really.

Help me be a comfort to my boy who is having a tantrum and my girl who is floundering, crying on the floor. Help me be patient with the toddler gripping my arm saying "MOMMY!" over and over, jumping up and down, with tears streaming down his face. How I feel like I need to do that with You sometimes, Lord!